Sylvester and Diesel are two special boys,
Rescued from farms when the size of mere toys.
It took some time to learn their way around the place,
Especially staying the hell off my face.
Diesel will come up and meow like he needs you
But once you get up he runs off like he’s cool.
He likes to be petted and scratched with my hands,
But hold him to close he’ll immediately stand.
Sylvester is more like a dog than a cat,
I taught him to beg and he lies on his back.
Regardless of how much of his dry food he ate,
He stands by the table wanting what’s on my plate.
They sit by me nearly the entire day
But sometimes they will just go wander away.
Checking the corners and under the couch,
Looking for toys or the catnip-full pouch.
They never are startled by drums that I have,
But run like the wind from a small plastic bag.
They both are so generous, kind to a fault,
And mix food with hair and cough up the result.
They jump in and out of their big litter box,
Scattering granules like miniature rocks.
I’m also allergic to dander and hair,
But they do not know it and don’t really care.
They are so friendly and sociable too,
Rubbing their face on the top of your shoe.
No help with chores nor the bills I must pay,
Just eating and sleeping and chillin’ all day.
They chewed up a bit of the carpet downstairs,
And leave behind hair on the couches and chairs.
But do I complain, grumble or grouse?
You betcha I do it is my freakin’ house!